Mantras for Motherhood is my new blog series, where I talk about the little quotes and phrases that get me through life as a mum to three little ones, get me focussing on the good stuff and keep mama guilt at bay as much as possible. I love a motivational quote on a Monday morning, facebook and Instagram are full of them, but to be honest most of the offerings that float around my timeline don’t really apply to my life… it’s hard to get ‘fired up’ about ‘smashing my goals’ or ‘reaching my dreams’ when my goal is just to get everyone dressed so we can go to the shop and get milk, and my dream is to get to bedtime without any major calamities… shoot for the moon indeed.
So I’ve been saving little quotes that really do help whenever I find them, and they have evolved into six mantras that I look at most days and even better than that, if I’m having a crappy day, if I’m stressing over something or feeling like a rubbish mum, I can usually find a mantra that will help me out and give me some perspective on the situation.
Every Monday for the next few weeks I will be introducing you to one of my mantras and what it means to me. Some of them I have done a facebook live chat about, so I will put the video in where I can, and even better than that… I have made you a printable version of my mantra cards for you to print off and use at home if you want to! Just click HERE to find all the posts in the series, and the link to your free printable download.
So, onto today’s mantra…
This is the mantra that I need when I’m doubting myself and questioning everything. You know when you don’t know whether you’re doing the right things with your children and you really agonise over a decision you need to make or something you are doing?
Sometimes Carl and I can make parenting decisions really easily, sometimes the answer is obvious to us after a little research or it’s such a no brainer to us that we didn’t even need to think about it. They might not be the right decisions for everybody, but they are undoubtedly the best ones for us and our family. Things like whether I would try and breastfeed and whether to let the kids sleep in our bed when they need to.
But sometimes (quite a lot of the time to be honest) it’s not that straight forward. Sometimes I really worry that I’m going to do something wrong or make a decision that’s going to negatively impact on my children’s future. And it doesn’t even have to be big things like whether to home educate or not or whether to have another baby or not… it can even be silly things like whether they should be having swimming lessons by now and should I make them go to ballet class if they decide they don’t want to go today?
But when my mind starts going into overdrive and I start panicking that I’m ruining my children’s lives because I haven’t sold the house to buy them a pony… I have to remind myself that what’s done in love, is done well.
And by that I mean that as long as we make the decisions from a place of love and empathy for our little people, then we can’t go far wrong. That doesn’t always mean that your first decision is always going to be the right one… but it doesn’t matter! Because if I’m always parenting with love and being responsive to what’s best for my children, then things aren’t going to go far wrong before we realise and can put them right.
There are very few things that are permanent, and no one decision is going to change the entire course of your child’s life, if you don’t let it.
This mantra reminds me not to worry about doing the wrong thing or making the wrong decision, because what matters is love, not always being right. As long as it’s done in love, it’s done well, and there’s nothing to worry about.
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